Bare today bra tomorrow

I’m glad I wasn’t around when feminism was fashionable and not just because I consider myself a shit feminist. I’m glad because I’d have been mortified by the entire bra burning trend. On a different note though I agree that some bras need to be burnt, the ugly, ill fitting, gone bobbly in the wash ones that some women cling into for dear life, but that’s a different story and those days where a different era…

Nowadays I don’t see any reason why women should be traipsing around braless, regardless of what size you are: there is now a size to fit everybody. So there is no excuse.

So why do people still walk about with their meat balloons swinging around in the wind like some saggy, neglected accessory?

It’s not hard to get measured now: so many places offer a free measuring service and if you’re of a larger cup then I recommend Bravissimo. It’s where I got measured and it changed my life: it changes your posture, transforms your figure and gives you confidence that you never had before. I’m now proud of my bust size (I went from being a D to an F!): their perky and have a great shape. I’m happier with the way I look now and feel better knowing that they are not going south due to poor support.

However if you’re smaller than a D cup then celebrate! You can enjoy loads of styles and shop way more conveniently (and cheaply) than the larger ladies.

So please wear a bra regardless of what size you are. Yes smaller boobs out of their cages are less offensive but not by much. Why? Well because, I don’t want to know how cold or aroused you are! Ew. NO. I am trying to have a conversation with you- not your tits, so put them away. Visually it’s distracting and most times quite revolting (why are they mostly fat, old women that don’t wear bras?!). It’s embarrassing, offensive and worse still lazy. I don’t care that you’re more comfortable braless, that’s fine if you’re at home but not in public and don’t give me that freedom of expression shit. You’re not “expressing” anything unique or individual about yourself. You’re visually telling me that you don’t give a shit about how you look anymore and don’t give a damn about whether it offends people.

Like I was saying earlier, there are plenty of places now that offer a free measuring service. Yes some places may be a little hard to get to; Bravissimo for example is in Brighton – to which I have to travel more than an hour to get to, but it was more than worth it.

Yes I know it’s a hassle but tough shit. That’s what you get for being born a woman, but think of it this way. Underwear is our secret weapon; it can be the fabric that men’s fantasies are based upon. Underwear is so clever and versatile: it can be as daring or as modest as you want it to be. Heck with the invention of magic knickers, underwear can even help hide the bits you’re not so proud of!

Underwear is an extension of your wardrobe- your identity. You can change it to suit your mood and it has more power than you could ever imagine

So celebrate the joy of having breasts! Treat them well and they will reward you in return, believe me, I know.